As Seligman et al. say, there is a difference between thinking that a bad event cannot be changed and it is going to last forever, and thinking that we can change at least part of the negative event or our feelings about the event. Rational-emotive thinking or RET helps children see stressful and troubling events as problems to be solved as opposed to personal threats.
Prompting the Student
Bernard and Joyce (1984, p. 195) recommend using the following prompts to help the student clarify the irrational ideas or beliefs (B) that trigger a particular emotion or behavior:
-What were you thinking when _____ happened?
-What sorts of things were you saying to yourself when…?
-What name did you call Ricky when…?
-Tell me the first thing that comes into your mind when you think about _____.
-Picture yourself back in the classroom; what did you think when…?
The Disputation Technique
In RET, the goal is not to change A (to make the negative event disappear), but to change the student’s reaction to the event, so that the child learns to accept what happened and tries to change only the parts that can be changed. Rather than spending time discussing A (the activating event), the RET teacher intervenes at the B level or beliefs. Zionts (1996) recommends asking the student, "What if it is true? What is the worst thing that can happen?" Alternatively, we can ask, "Assume that you are never going to _____. Why is that so awful?" The objective of this kind of disputation is to show the student that although the event is uncomfortable, it is probably not terrible, and the child can stand it. When using a RET approach, the teacher needs to be careful to allow the student to dispute his own errors in thinking (self-disputation) before the teacher does.
When disputing an irrational belief, the child identifies the way he is evaluating the event and the things he is saying to himself that are causing him to feel angry or upset. Zionts advises teachers not to ask, "How this situation makes you feel?" (external attribution) but to ask the child, "How do you feel about this situation?" The first question blames the event for the child’s feelings; the second question implies that the student is responsible for his feelings and reactions. In addition, you can ask, "What was going through your mind that caused you to feel this way?"
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